Coming Soon, September 23, 2008 (Prologue)

I bought a blank leather bound journal for the memorial/open house for the attendees to write their happy memories of Marilyn. While others memories may find their way transcribed into this blog, so far I have made just one entry in it. I even carried it around for a month before I decided to do it this way, writing it out in a Word document. I started carrying it after a somewhat tearful conversation with my oldest daughter who pointed out that writing something would be a good way for Marilyn’s grandchildren yet to be born to get to know their grandmother.

My problem is all my happy memories end up being bitter sweet so I had a certain writer’s block to writing them in a “happy” memory book.

Another friend suggested that I start a blog, this one, as a way to write all these memories and potentially attract readers who could then help keep the Marilyn Westbrook Garment Fund, well, funded. While I was enamored with this idea, I didn’t want it to be a maudlin daily recounting of my current day filled with missing. But it does allow me to be more complete by not binding myself to only happy memories or excluding the bittersweet portions. (Read my description of asking her to marry me in a future posting.)

However, since I truly don’t know what I want to write when, I am writing individual items according to topic without strict regard to chronology. Other than this prologue, I will start posting individual topics starting September 23, 2008, ten days after my son's wedding.

Thus my compromise, I have decided to write a collection that I can edit and select from to put in this blog. The Word document can be a better form factor for eventually giving to my grandchildren so they can know of the grandmother they will never meet.

During the Tim Russert memorial it was mentioned that he consoled a friend who lost a son that if he had been offered the choice of 17 years with such a great person he would have jumped at it. I feel the same way about the 30 years I had with Marilyn. However, if I had known it would have only been 30 years I would have made a point of enjoying them more. As it is, I have many great memories.

Doyle Westbrook
Loving husband of Marilyn

As to the "why" of the blog:

As a result of cancer, surgery for cancer, conditions present at birth, specific lymphatic diseases, ... many people suffer from lymphedema. People who cannot afford to do anything but "live with it," and there are many, often hide away their impairment as it can be as disfiguring as it is debilitating. When Marilyn's cancer created lymphedema in her left leg so severe that she was bedridden, a living saving lymphedema garment from Don Kellogg, inventor and founder of Telesto Medtech, not only restored her mobility after wearing it for only a half day, it allowed her to attend her daughter's wedding, join her family and her daughter's new in-laws at the Thanksgiving table, and meet her son's fiancee's mother. It made the last few months of her life living months rather than just waiting for a death that would have come even sooner than it did had she not been truly living during them.

Even though there are amazing treatments available that can restore a measure of normalcy, due to about half the states not considering these treatments as medical devices and the insurance companies following suit, people are left to suffer in silence and frequently alone. In Marilyn's name and memory, this has become our cause. With Saskia Thiadens and the National Lymphedema Network, a special fund to help people who cannot otherwise afford these garments has been established, the Marilyn Westbrook Garment Fund.

If funding were to be left to my resources alone, it would be too little help and the memory of Marilyn far too short. Please use the links embedded in this posting to donate to this worthy cause. The National Lymphedema Network (NLN) is a 501 (c) 3 organization. Donations to the NLN, including those designated to the Marilyn Westbrook Fund, are fully tax deductible to the limits of your tax circumstances.